Thrall & Jaina meet the Doctor
by OzrekO'North
Summary: A would-be intimate night between two of Azeroth's most prominent figures results in an impromptu meeting with a strange man in a blue box...


The bell tower rang out twice as the full moon rose over it. Jaina Proudmoore excitedly looked toward the strange new device she had acquired, which lay flat on the floor, a bright red light glowing from it's hollow center. Whether it was magic or goblin technology or some strange contrivance born of both was of no concern to her now. Only that an appointed time had come, and she eagerly stared at the glowing light as it grew brighter and seemingly larger. In a few seconds, what had begun as an ember was now a man-sized raging aurora surrounding a plasmic vortex stretching beyond her vision. A few seconds later, and the man she sought was emerging from the portal.

As a head of state, she knew that the proper usage of such means as this should remain strictly diplomatic in nature. But on a more primal, feminine level, her heart had sought this technology in hopes that such covert maneuvers as this might be employed.

Stepping out of the portal, He stood before her not as an armored Warchief, but as a wizened yet battle-hardened shaman, wearing in place of a shirt a few beaded necklaces bearing skulls and seemingly random other bits and bones, along with the traditional leather pants and boots of his people. No sword nor axe bore he this night, for he had come as a lover, not a fighter.

He studied her lithe and dainty yet tantalizingly athletic figure. The shaman in him saw the wizard in her, recognizing her to be of great power, and he looked forward to an exchange of energy.

Her body yearned for his touch. Thrall was the epitome of masculinity, it was as if someone had taken all the muscle of a Tauren and packed it neatly into this chiseled frame of iron beneath a warm layer of emerald leather.

No words were spoken, or indeed needed. His eyes caught hers in a maelstrom of desire, and both were drawn toward one another as though their perfect polarity was forcing them to join. The gown she wore bared her left leg to the hip, and almost instinctively Thrall caressed her alabaster thigh with a hand large enough to wrap around it, and strong enough to snap it in an instant, but with an amazingly delicate touch for such a brute as he.

His spirit engaged her mind, and their energies began to weave and twist through the aether as their bodies prepared for a more vulgar union. Sounds of the voices of the elements seemed to shake the room as the songs of the mana wyrms both warped space and stretched time, in an odd wheezing rhythm, growing louder and louder...

Thrall's warrior senses detected that they were no longer alone, and he wheeled about, placing himself between Lady Jaina and this unknown intruder. What he saw before him was baffling, even for someone who has traveled two worlds, slain demons, and fought alongside dragons. For all the whining and almost-mechanical grinding he expected something more magical than a blue wooden box. Was this some Gnomish trickery? It had an odd pattern of squares on its front, half of which suddenly swung open revealing a door, out of which a man who appeared human with an affable smile was waving.

"Hello, I'm the Doctor", he said, still smiling like a buffoon as he stepped out of the strange blue box, "Where am I?"

Thrall was livid at this intrusion. With restrained rage but stern rebuke he barkingly replied "You are in Theramore Keep, in the bedchambers of Lady Jaina Proudmoore!" His anger rising and his voice growing louder, he roared "I am Thrall, Warchief of the Horde, and you will explain yourself or die where you stand!"

Lady Jaina, too, was irate at not only the intrusion but the hideous timing of it. She had waited too long and employed too much clandestine maneuvering to let this night be ruined by some interloper. Throwing discipline to the wind, she lashed out with her mastery over magic and held the Doctor paralyzed where he stood. Thrall, energies still in-tune with his intended partner in affection, commanded the elements to force the Doctor to speak only the truth.

"What brings you here?" Thrall growled in obvious irritation.

The Doctor was perplexed as to how, but the chemicals in his brain responded to whatever power the large green man had over the element of water, which extended beyond the simple molecule of water to include the very nature of fluidity. Fighting it anyways just on reflex, he stammered "Stolen- technology... sssSales.."

Jaina marched forward threateningly. "You wish to sell us stolen technology? And THIS is how you..."

The Doctor saw what was going on and instantly stopped fighting the coercive forces, which allowed him to speak freely so long as he spoke only fact. "No! No no no, you've got me all wrong!" He rolled his eyes, smiled that goofy grin again and continued, "You HAVE bought stolen technology, completely alien to this world" he nodded as though to convey that they should approve, "I'm here to retrieve it..."

The looks on the faces of the couple gave him the distinct impression that he had interrupted something very important and personal, and that he was being viewed as a most unappreciated obstruction to an otherwise wonderful night. Talking was what the Doctor was good at, so he figured he better keep doing it if he didn't want to find out what other abilities these two might be mindful to use on him.

"If you might let me look around the room, I could detect the offending anomaly, confiscate it, hand you each a jelly baby, and be on my way! You shan't see me again!" He was really hoping the goofy grin was working, despite little indication of such on the faces of the couple.

Jaina didn't trust this strange man who appeared human, something about him was anything but. He seemed dressed too warmly for this climate, with a long coat and oversized scarf under a floppy hat, insinuating his box was indeed capable of magical transport. Still, being a skilled diplomat, she acknowledged their mutual desire to be rid of the man as soon as possible. If he did mean her any harm, Thrall would see to it that the blow never land and any poison be neutralized. If he believed she was in possession of stolen technology, perhaps he might subvert some clandestine plot. She begrudgingly decided to free him from the paralyzation, sharply saying "Make it swift, stranger".

"I'm the Doctor", he corrected her.

"I don't care about your trade, get to your task!" she barked.

"It's my name, not my trade, and since you know it, I'm not a stranger, am I?"

"GET TO IT!" she erupted, catching the Doctor mid-smile and defeating it.

The Doctor reached into his long coat, and Thrall's eyes followed him closely, expecting him to draw a weapon. Recognizing the tactical look in the green, tusked, stocky yet heavily muscled man's eyes, the Doctor held up his left hand in a peaceful, open-palmed gesture, saying "I must retrieve my..." He rethought his words, realizing he wasn't in a very technological setting, "I must draw my wand, but fear not, it will only divine the location of the artifact I seek, it is not a weapon".

He pulled out his sonic screwdriver and the couple's facial expressions now appeared more confused than enraged. "What a strange wand, it looks more like a musical instrument!" Jaina exclaimed in a stifled giggle. To her it appeared as fake as a child's toy. The Doctor pressed a button and slid his thumb up and over on another strip alongside the strange gadget. It emitted a repeating sound which grew in intensity as the Doctor walked closer to the portal generator.

Following the sound, the Doctor walked directly toward the device which had permitted Thrall's furtive abscondence from the Valley of Wisdom within Orgrimmar. Jaina feared that without it, she may have to arrange for Thrall to be snuck out of Theramore in a fashion unbecoming of a Warchief.

Nearly tripping over the roundish gold-colored metal disk for which he was searching, as he focused on the screwdriver, apparently puzzled by the assortment of colored lights dancing around the tip. Looking down, the Doctor's face went ashen and his jaw dropped. Quickly crouching beside it, he waved the sonic screwdriver around the device, poking at parts and sliding others along it's shaft, then just as suddenly, he stood up, turned off the screwdriver, and tucked it away in his coat before turning to face Lady Jaina with a very stern face.

This time, the stern face was his, and Jaina, for all of her arcane power and current frustration, felt oddly humbled by his glare. His sudden seriousness even surprised Thrall, who became more keen to listen to him than rend him limb from limb. The Doctor seemed unsure how to begin, opening his mouth to start and then closing it again, shaking his head, then attempting again, and deciding against it again. After a moment of him wordlessly making various facial expressions, he nodded as though he'd made a decision, refocused on the couple, and began to explain.

"In the truest words I can say, what you have there is a PL9 transmat from the Virgo Cluster. It goes without saying that such a thing hardly belongs on what's at best a PL3 planet on the other side of the universe from it's source. What's worse is it's made of Dalekenium, which means it's..." He realized by the blank stares he was receiving that his audience wasn't following. He stopped and smiled again, as was his custom, and offered them each a Jelly Baby, a curious sugary candy he'd developed a liking for and which neither of these two had ever seen. "It's a confection, they're quite good", he said as he popped one in his mouth and chewed so as to prove they weren't poisonous. He began again, "It is a magic portal through which very mighty invaders can assault your world. It isn't safe to have this on your world, and you'd do well to let me remove it."

Jaina turned to Thrall. "Our world has enough of war and cataclysm, of invasion and upheaval. We need not another." Thrall nodded in agreement, silently granting the Doctor leave of both the room and the effects of his spell.

The Doctor struggled to lift the Transmat, but didn't dare to ask the muscled man for help. He knew he'd impinged enough this night. Thankfully, the device was round, and once up on it's side, rolled easily enough into the blue box. Thrall strained to look inside the box, but beyond the doorway seemed a magical sort of darkness that his sight could not penetrate. The Doctor's head poked out of that darkness one last time as he asked Lady Jaina "If you don't mind me asking, ma'am, how did you come to be in possession of this dastardly object?"

Jaina remembered a moonless night on an unlit dock in Theramore Bay. "I purchased it discreetly, from a man who claimed to be a merchant of magical oddities. He said it would create portals to wherever it was focused. It took me half a month to gain control of it with arcane arts, and I suspected it was not of any form of magic known to Azeroth."

"Did the man give you a name?" the Doctor asked.

"Yes, oddly enough he seemed quite keen that I know it, in case I 'needed anything else'. I suspect he was the Captain of a privateer vessel for the Steamwheedle Cartel, as he seemed well educated for a barterer in plundered goods. He said his name was Harkness, Captain Jack Harkness.

The Doctor scratched his head, something in his being responded to that name, but he was sure he hadn't heard it before, or at least... yet. "I'll remember that, perhaps I'll run into him sometime." With that, he closed the door of the blue box, and without hesitation, the wheezing, screeching sound of Jaina and Thrall assumed must be arcanely powered machinery filled the room and then faded, just as the box itself began to do, until after a few seconds, the box was gone and all was quiet again.

The sound had apparently alerted the guards, for Jaina heard them scrambling up the stairs toward her quarters in Theramore tower. Thrall heard them too, and looking at Jaina, cupped her now teary-eyed face in his gruff but loving hand, and whispered "Another time, my lady", as he rubbed a curiously glowing stone on one of his necklaces, and disappeared, using the magic of the Hearth to return to his home.


End file.
